Hey man sorry I got all grabby
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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