What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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