5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
how does that bad decision feel?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
