Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
