R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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