i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
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