thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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