So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize