Please, let me fuck your mom
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize