ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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