Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Randomize
