i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
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I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
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There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
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