I'm really into asian looking animals
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize