suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize