YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
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