Your tits are I can't wait for
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize