I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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