I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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