I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
