Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters