I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get