do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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