I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize