I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
My breasts were aching with rage.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.