I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight