Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.