Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize