Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize