I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize