just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize