We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
