ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds