Just mADE A PArabola og urine
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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