i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
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i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
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I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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