So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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