Texts From Last Night

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  (407): View more from Florida

  I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"

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  (407): I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays" http://tfl.nu/5s21
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.

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  (248): I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight. http://tfl.nu/uwp5
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair

  (573): View more from Missouri

  Found more tequila

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  (573): I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair (573): Found more tequila http://tfl.nu/cg6k
  Replies (9) Good night (4466) Bad night (432)
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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever

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  (225): were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever http://tfl.nu/h34v
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog

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  (860): Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog http://tfl.nu/fdsx
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  (818): View more from California

  I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.

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  (818): I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head. http://tfl.nu/x66l
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  (805): View more from California

  Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke

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  (805): Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke http://tfl.nu/mqiv
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.

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  (443): When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain. http://tfl.nu/mvaw
  Replies (6) Good night (2114) Bad night (817) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.

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  (401): anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches. http://tfl.nu/n5i2
  Replies (17) Good night (4673) Bad night (589) Order T-Shirt
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  (607): View more from New York

  So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.

  (607): View more from New York

  These are the moments that bond souls forever.

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  (607): So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan. (607): These are the moments that bond souls forever. http://tfl.nu/nwlm
  Replies (2) Good night (895) Bad night (333)
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  (320): View more from Minnesota

  So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.

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  (320): So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian. http://tfl.nu/850i
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now

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  (610): Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now http://tfl.nu/qopz
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.

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  (541): Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal. http://tfl.nu/2v18
  Replies (0) Good night (352) Bad night (168) Order T-Shirt
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her

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  (865): He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her http://tfl.nu/a25x
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.

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  (774): preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts. http://tfl.nu/6ehv
  Replies (3) Good night (515) Bad night (172) Order T-Shirt

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