I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking