I have demons in me.
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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