She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
