State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Boobs speak an international language.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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