At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
