Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
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