you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize