maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
