Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up