pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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