I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize