Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state

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  (847): Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state http://tfl.nu/3q3r
  Replies (58) Good night (1663) Bad night (389) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.

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  (651): Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward. http://tfl.nu/djmy
  Replies (64) Good night (1734) Bad night (8281) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?

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  (717): he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks? http://tfl.nu/42dk
  Replies (10) Good night (721) Bad night (3909) Order T-Shirt
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.

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  (708): You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook. http://tfl.nu/mlr4
  Replies (24) Good night (4259) Bad night (655) Order T-Shirt
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you

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  (602): I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you http://tfl.nu/rxgp
  Replies (22) Good night (1359) Bad night (4020) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.

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  (303): We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is. http://tfl.nu/mbfy
  Replies (6) Good night (3471) Bad night (915) Order T-Shirt
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.

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  (734): Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books. http://tfl.nu/5hjw
  Replies (17) Good night (4073) Bad night (611) Order T-Shirt
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  (+04): View more from

  She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.

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  (+04): She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf. http://tfl.nu/hr1t
  Replies (7) Good night (1020) Bad night (783) Order T-Shirt
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  (435): View more from Utah

  Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night

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  (435): Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night http://tfl.nu/xeqd
  Replies (19) Good night (1747) Bad night (1026) Order T-Shirt
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...

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  (507): I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs... http://tfl.nu/9q2b
  Replies (6) Good night (1066) Bad night (634) Order T-Shirt
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  (850): View more from Florida

  My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco

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  (850): My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco http://tfl.nu/szsc
  Replies (5) Good night (1310) Bad night (336) Order T-Shirt
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  (213): View more from California

  you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say

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  (213): you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say http://tfl.nu/62ic
  Replies (2) Good night (845) Bad night (248) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night

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  (973): Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night http://tfl.nu/x2gj
  Replies (5) Good night (531) Bad night (419) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...

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  (215): Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or... http://tfl.nu/y16p
  Replies (8) Good night (588) Bad night (727) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how

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  (610): How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how http://tfl.nu/j1wy
  Replies (4) Good night (704) Bad night (163)

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