I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
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My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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