Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
And then my night got REAL pukey
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
