The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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