Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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